Post by Sedra on Sept 13, 2010 20:37:25 GMT -8
Name: Sedra (the human's name was Catherine Kay Michel)
Age: 40
Power: Mental projection
Primary/Bonded Skills:
Childcare (1)
Energy Weaponry (3)
Explosives (2)
Gambling (2)
Piloting (1)
Mercantilism & Appraisal (1)
Secondary Skills:
Energy Weapon Maintenance
Demolition Theory
Astronomy
Human Anatomy
Vehicle Maintenance (Flying)
Psychology
Cooking
Profession (Current): Co-owner of a luxury cruiser, where she handles the business side.
Profession (Past): In the past, Sedra was one of the Naz Sub-generals on the planet Roken. She was placed in charge of a spaceship weaponry testing and research facility out in the desert, and eventually was in charge of another facility that did experimental tests on free human subjects.
Marital Status: Married
Home World: Roken
Religious Beliefs: Atheist
Socioeconomic Status: Middle-class
Cultural Upbringing: Sedra was born and raised in a Naz dominated society; Ruthlessness is favored among the Naz, and it is what got you to a higher rank. Greed was something that was also taught quite broadly--one had to look after oneself, especially at the expense of others. If a Naz fell behind, that meant they were weaker and thus unneeded. Humans were seen as inferior and as things to be used; they were viewed much like cattle have been by humans over the centuries. This meant that much of Naz society was surrounded around the ideas of power, dominance, and ambition. Because the Naz were forced to dominate the will of another sentient creature to exist, they had to develop the view that they were better--that somehow this was how it should be.
All of these ideals were taught to Sedra the moment she was able to understand them. As a young Naz, they became her existence and her moral compass. It wasn't until she actually began to experience the vast spectrum of the human experience that she was able to see that the Naz could possibly be wrong about some things. It is, and still continues to be, a struggle for her at some points.
Physical Description: Sedra's human body, once belonging to her host Catherine, is of French and Irish descent. Because of that, her skin can be quite fair; she is more likely to burn in the sun than to tan. Over the past few years of wandering, her slender figure has filled out to a more healthy and curvy weight. To keep fit, and as part of a daily morning ritual, Sedra practices Catherine's old ballet stretches.
Age has deepened much of Sedra's appearance. Where she once had a more fierce appearance to her face, the years have softened her features into a slightly more approachable look. There is still an air of arrogance and detachment that surrounds her, however, and most people tend not to try and bother her. Her eyes are a icy blue beneath the delicate arch of her eyebrows, and her lips are usually unsmiling. Sedra's hair falls just past shoulder-length and is a dark, wavy chestnut. Most times it is kept loose, but Sedra also enjoys tying the length of it up into messy buns.
As a young Naz Sub-general, Sedra had been concerned with keeping up an appearance of formality and power. With much of that out of the picture these days, Sedra's taste in attire has turned much more casual. Sometimes she wears a simple blouse and jeans outfit or tank-tops and shorts, and other times she enjoys a summer or fancy dress.
Personality: As a child, Catherine got in trouble frequently. When it followed her into her teens, she was described by a doctor as having 'too much negative energy' and given advice to take up a hobby or take pills. Catherine chose to take up photography, and fell in love with it. As Catherine grew older, she developed into a more peaceful and laid-back person. When she was a free human, Catherine found herself to be a very calm and level-headed person in bad situations--one of the many traits she inherited from her father. Being a natural introvert, many people found Catherine to be aloof or stand-offish. This never meant that she had nothing to say--it was more that she didn't need to fill the silent space with meaningless words. Her mother ingrained in her a sense of patience and empathy for other people, but her years spent as a slave to a Naz slowly chipped away at her. Eventually, when there was no end in sight, some part of her broke.
Sedra, on the other hand, has always been ambitious and proud. Like most Naz, Sedra had a large ego and had trouble acknowledging she could be wrong in situations. When it comes to certain situations--especially when she has power over someone--she can tend to be a bit hypocritical in her actions and words. As a young Naz, Sedra displayed many of the well sought after traits: arrogance, greed, ruthlessness. Sedra always assumed that she was the best person for the job, and that lower ranked Naz were worthless. This detachment from other people (Naz or otherwise) allowed her to kill others for her own personal gain without feeling remorse, which in turn caused her to jump quickly through the ranks.
Negative emotions--anger, hatred, cruelty--played a big role in most of her interactions with others, and anything softer than that was usually avoided or hidden from view. Many of the Naz ranked below her learnt quickly that she had a short fuse and very low patience for stupidity. Throughout the years, she perfected the art of keeping her face clean of any emotions, something that aided in her survival in the cutthroat environment of Naz society and politics.
Still, there were always the seeds of compassion in Sedra. Even before the events that shaped her later on in her life, Sedra had been fascinated by the gentle nuances of human life. Lassic's love, Eva's birth, Luce's love: all of it helped break through her tough guard and enable her to feel more empathy for others. It was a slow journey, and it took many years for it to take a firm root in Sedra. The anchor that always seemed to keep Sedra grounded was Catherine's presence. While she treated Catherine mostly with disdain and distance, there was always part of her that admired her host. She respected Catherine much more than she ever let on, and has only begun to let herself acknowledge the fact that she did indeed like her host--now that her host seems to be gone.
Ten years passed since Catherine's "disappearance" from Sedra's host body. Guilt, an emotion rarely felt for this Naz, has plagued her ever since. While she continues to view the body she lives within as her own, there are still times where she doubts what she has done--especially to her host Catherine. Her host was the ever-present consciousness running in the background, and the silence can sometimes be unbearable. As far as she knows, she has been given Catherine's body indefinitely.
Those ten years have mellowed her out to some degree. She has gained a deeper understanding of humanity and all of its complexity, and has even formed some sympathy for them. She has less of a tendency to treat other people as stepping stones, or lash out in annoyance when someone doesn't do something perfectly. Sedra is much more at ease in her own skin, as there is no more voice in the back of her head or constant struggle for control. It's an odd feeling that she has yet to get completely used to.
Sedra still feels uncomfortable around most people. For most of her life, Sedra spent her time feeling like an alien that was hiding or shielding her true self from other Naz. The only two people that have been let into the softer side of her personality is Luce and Eva. Everyone else continues to be kept at a distance.
History: Catherine Kay Michel was born to her parents Owen and Jane Michel, in one of the southwest desert cities on Roken. She had an older sister and eventually a younger sister. Her father worked for the government and was gone for long hours during the day, while her mother was frequently unemployed and looking for work. Catherine spent much of her earlier years attempting to impress her father, with the encouragement of her much-more-involved mother. Her mother enrolled her in ballet classes as a young child, and Catherine enjoyed doing it up until the age of 8, when she quit.
Her middle school and high school years were chaotic. Catherine often found herself getting into arguments with her teachers and sent off to the principal's office or detention. If she had really applied herself, Catherine may have gotten high marks on her grades. Instead, she ended up ditching most of her classes with friends and smoking or drinking. This all ended up culminating to a trip to juvie on a charge of arson when she was sixteen. This stay--along with the vast disappointment expressed by her parents--frightened her enough to help get her back on track.
Once Catherine graduated from high school, she enrolled in the local community college and began working towards a degree in teaching young children--something her father would have liked. In the middle of her college years, she met Mark. It took perhaps half a year before he proposed to her, and they got married not soon after. Catherine was still a young twenty year old when this happened, and her parents weren't too thrilled with the idea. Still, Catherine was able to finish her degree and begin working as a student teacher at one of the elementary schools.
Three years later Catherine had her first child, a son named Andrew. The happiness of being a parent was short-lived, however, as Catherine was lured by Mark (who had been infected by Naz a year or so earlier) to a doctor's office where Catherine was infected. Thus, Sedra was born.
Sedra began as a low-ranking Naz, and her sole job was to lure Catherine's father Owen to be infected. This plan was ultimately successful, and Catherine's whole family was eventually infested by the Naz. Seeing that Sedra was a competent Naz, the higher-ups decided to promote her to the government facility that they had just recently taken from Catherine's father. This facility was transformed into a place to test and create spaceship weaponry. After a few months in charge, Sedra was sent off into space and onto one of the Naz spaceships to be trained in energy weapon usage and general weapons knowledge. Sedra had a particular interest in the scientific and mathematical aspect of life, and so much of her learning came naturally.
Two years after Catherine's infestation by Sedra, she returned to Roken to direct the activities at the desert facility. This was where Sedra met another Naz called Lassic. Some months after Sedra had began an illicit relationship with Lassic, she became pregnant with a daughter, Eva. Mark's Naz, Sefren, found out about this and threatened to expose the two of them. Sedra was forced to allow both Andrew and Eva to be taken away to a facility located on some mysterious part of the world. A year later, Lassic (in another body, this time female) disappeared as well.
Sedra was left alone and in charge of the facility--until, that is, Lassic reappeared. It turns out that Lassic's host had been freed in the process, and Sedra was thrown into a very confusing period of her life; defying common sense, she realized that she had begun to develop feelings for the free human. With a little bit of help from some free humans, Sedra was able to free her children as well. For a year, Sedra spent time raising her children in secrecy and juggling a very tricky situation with the free human resistance.
Eventually this all caught up to her. Her relationship and her children were found out by some high Naz officials, and she was sentenced to a fixed trial. Facing a slow and agonizing death, Sedra and Luce decided to find a way to leave the planet and escape with their children. During the escape, however, there was an accident involving Sedra and Catherine. This accident ended up giving Sedra full control over Catherine's body, and suddenly the Naz found herself completely alone in an alien body.
RP Sample: ((This writing sample is actually a short story I wrote awhile back involving Catherine and her father.))
Tick tick tick tick.
"Dad."
Catherine was surprised how soft her voice had come out. The word was quickly swallowed by the steady tick tick tick of her father's keyboard. Catherine stood in the door frame of his study, her slender fingers clasp delicately around the glossy square of a Polaroid. Her father was seated across from the doorway, his frame outlined by the white glow of the computer screen. He was hunched over, glasses shining and fingers tapping away. Papers were stacked in various columns near him, and sticky notes lined up in rows along the nearby wall. It was an intimidating room to be in--large, bare, and cold. When she had been younger, she had never been allowed in. However, the door had been open tonight which usually meant she could go in and visit. That he wasn't busy. But he was clearly wrapped up in something at his computer tonight.
He's working. Probably shouldn't bother him. Catherine twisted the ball of her foot against the hardwood floor, tracing her fingers around the thin edges of the photo in her hand. Tentatively, she took another step forward. She cleared her throat. "Hey. Dad?"
His typing stopped abruptly, and he ran a heavy hand through his dark hair. Then, with a prolonged sigh, he leaned back. The leather chair gave a low squeak and tilted. Catherine lifted her eyebrows, anticipating him turning around to face her. He didn't bother. "What, Catherine?" Trying not to let it faze her, she straightened.
"I have something for you," she said, flipping the photo over and over nervously. She started to walk towards him, but caught herself and stopped. Tapping a finger against the photo, she tilted her head. His head was blocking the computer monitor, but she could see some sort of program open. "Do you want to see it?" The question was immediately met with a loud sigh. Catherine flinched.
"Quick, I have to get back to working. This is important."
Catherine felt her heart lift. She skittered over to his computer desk, dodging a couple boxes that had been laid carelessly around on the floor. She placed the photo flat on his desk, and then stepped back patiently. He adjusted his glasses, scooping the photo from off his desk. As he looked at it, Catherine began talking.
"I figured, you know. You like the desert, and you like cactus flowers. So I went out, me and a couple friends, outside. And we were out, and I found this crazy looking flower--"
He held it back out to her. "Yeah, it's great."
Catherine stopped, eyes resting on the photo. He hadn't even looked at it long enough to see what it was. She tried not to frown, plucking it from between his fingertips so it wouldn't fall. "Well. Yeah, but it's for you dad."
"Oh. Okay." His voice held a hint of impatience. He wanted her to leave. On all other days, Catherine would have. She wouldn't have even tried this in the first place, but it had been a suggestion from her mother. But it was useless. When had he ever cared about what she did? When had he ever given her anything but a passing interest? It always went this way. When she did something important? Something good? He'd just say 'okay'.
Doing well in school? Okay.
Made the honor roll? Okay.
Did a great performance in ballet? Okay.
Got into a great college? Okay.
About the only thing that had ever gotten his attention was when she had gone to juvie a couple years back. He had been angry, and he had yelled at her and threatened to take away her possessions and privileges. It had almost gotten her kicked out of the house, but he had reacted. It had made him care about something involving her, if only for a second.
Yet, had it been worth it? Her mother had been disappointed, and that disappointment had worn on Catherine. She couldn't stand seeing her mother's face with that expression. That 'we didn't raise you like this, what are you doing to our family?' look. Her sisters never got in trouble, they never did anything bad. Her cousins were the same way. They weren't her. So Catherine had asked her mother what to do, how to make her father happy. Her mother suggested doing this. "Give your father something he likes. Maybe a photo or something." She had said. "He'll appreciate the thought." Her mother's smile was encouraging--it always was--so Catherine had agreed to do it.
"Do you like it, dad?"
He had turned towards his computer again, one hand curled around the computer mouse. The other hand hovered over his keyboard. "Mhm." Tick tick tick tick. "You should use it for class or something. Don't you have some class you take for that stuff?" It wasn't a question that he would hear the answer to, even if she shouted it. He had already checked out of the conversation, checked out of her presence. His mind was back in his work.
Catherine felt her stomach tighten. She wanted to yell at him. The words were there, angry on her lips, ready to burst from her lungs. Instead, her expression flattened with a fake smile, and she let the photo slip from her fingertips. It spiraled and twirled lazily on its journey to the floor, coming to rest on top of her toes. The little scribbled note on the back was barely visible in the dim room light, but she knew what it said. For you. Love ya, Dad.
Lifting her foot away from it, she turned to the doorway. Then she paused. One last try, then she'd give up. "I'll just leave it here."
The response came later, once she had slipped out of the room. "Okay."
Age: 40
Power: Mental projection
Primary/Bonded Skills:
Childcare (1)
Energy Weaponry (3)
Explosives (2)
Gambling (2)
Piloting (1)
Mercantilism & Appraisal (1)
Secondary Skills:
Energy Weapon Maintenance
Demolition Theory
Astronomy
Human Anatomy
Vehicle Maintenance (Flying)
Psychology
Cooking
Profession (Current): Co-owner of a luxury cruiser, where she handles the business side.
Profession (Past): In the past, Sedra was one of the Naz Sub-generals on the planet Roken. She was placed in charge of a spaceship weaponry testing and research facility out in the desert, and eventually was in charge of another facility that did experimental tests on free human subjects.
Marital Status: Married
Home World: Roken
Religious Beliefs: Atheist
Socioeconomic Status: Middle-class
Cultural Upbringing: Sedra was born and raised in a Naz dominated society; Ruthlessness is favored among the Naz, and it is what got you to a higher rank. Greed was something that was also taught quite broadly--one had to look after oneself, especially at the expense of others. If a Naz fell behind, that meant they were weaker and thus unneeded. Humans were seen as inferior and as things to be used; they were viewed much like cattle have been by humans over the centuries. This meant that much of Naz society was surrounded around the ideas of power, dominance, and ambition. Because the Naz were forced to dominate the will of another sentient creature to exist, they had to develop the view that they were better--that somehow this was how it should be.
All of these ideals were taught to Sedra the moment she was able to understand them. As a young Naz, they became her existence and her moral compass. It wasn't until she actually began to experience the vast spectrum of the human experience that she was able to see that the Naz could possibly be wrong about some things. It is, and still continues to be, a struggle for her at some points.
Physical Description: Sedra's human body, once belonging to her host Catherine, is of French and Irish descent. Because of that, her skin can be quite fair; she is more likely to burn in the sun than to tan. Over the past few years of wandering, her slender figure has filled out to a more healthy and curvy weight. To keep fit, and as part of a daily morning ritual, Sedra practices Catherine's old ballet stretches.
Age has deepened much of Sedra's appearance. Where she once had a more fierce appearance to her face, the years have softened her features into a slightly more approachable look. There is still an air of arrogance and detachment that surrounds her, however, and most people tend not to try and bother her. Her eyes are a icy blue beneath the delicate arch of her eyebrows, and her lips are usually unsmiling. Sedra's hair falls just past shoulder-length and is a dark, wavy chestnut. Most times it is kept loose, but Sedra also enjoys tying the length of it up into messy buns.
As a young Naz Sub-general, Sedra had been concerned with keeping up an appearance of formality and power. With much of that out of the picture these days, Sedra's taste in attire has turned much more casual. Sometimes she wears a simple blouse and jeans outfit or tank-tops and shorts, and other times she enjoys a summer or fancy dress.
Personality: As a child, Catherine got in trouble frequently. When it followed her into her teens, she was described by a doctor as having 'too much negative energy' and given advice to take up a hobby or take pills. Catherine chose to take up photography, and fell in love with it. As Catherine grew older, she developed into a more peaceful and laid-back person. When she was a free human, Catherine found herself to be a very calm and level-headed person in bad situations--one of the many traits she inherited from her father. Being a natural introvert, many people found Catherine to be aloof or stand-offish. This never meant that she had nothing to say--it was more that she didn't need to fill the silent space with meaningless words. Her mother ingrained in her a sense of patience and empathy for other people, but her years spent as a slave to a Naz slowly chipped away at her. Eventually, when there was no end in sight, some part of her broke.
Sedra, on the other hand, has always been ambitious and proud. Like most Naz, Sedra had a large ego and had trouble acknowledging she could be wrong in situations. When it comes to certain situations--especially when she has power over someone--she can tend to be a bit hypocritical in her actions and words. As a young Naz, Sedra displayed many of the well sought after traits: arrogance, greed, ruthlessness. Sedra always assumed that she was the best person for the job, and that lower ranked Naz were worthless. This detachment from other people (Naz or otherwise) allowed her to kill others for her own personal gain without feeling remorse, which in turn caused her to jump quickly through the ranks.
Negative emotions--anger, hatred, cruelty--played a big role in most of her interactions with others, and anything softer than that was usually avoided or hidden from view. Many of the Naz ranked below her learnt quickly that she had a short fuse and very low patience for stupidity. Throughout the years, she perfected the art of keeping her face clean of any emotions, something that aided in her survival in the cutthroat environment of Naz society and politics.
Still, there were always the seeds of compassion in Sedra. Even before the events that shaped her later on in her life, Sedra had been fascinated by the gentle nuances of human life. Lassic's love, Eva's birth, Luce's love: all of it helped break through her tough guard and enable her to feel more empathy for others. It was a slow journey, and it took many years for it to take a firm root in Sedra. The anchor that always seemed to keep Sedra grounded was Catherine's presence. While she treated Catherine mostly with disdain and distance, there was always part of her that admired her host. She respected Catherine much more than she ever let on, and has only begun to let herself acknowledge the fact that she did indeed like her host--now that her host seems to be gone.
Ten years passed since Catherine's "disappearance" from Sedra's host body. Guilt, an emotion rarely felt for this Naz, has plagued her ever since. While she continues to view the body she lives within as her own, there are still times where she doubts what she has done--especially to her host Catherine. Her host was the ever-present consciousness running in the background, and the silence can sometimes be unbearable. As far as she knows, she has been given Catherine's body indefinitely.
Those ten years have mellowed her out to some degree. She has gained a deeper understanding of humanity and all of its complexity, and has even formed some sympathy for them. She has less of a tendency to treat other people as stepping stones, or lash out in annoyance when someone doesn't do something perfectly. Sedra is much more at ease in her own skin, as there is no more voice in the back of her head or constant struggle for control. It's an odd feeling that she has yet to get completely used to.
Sedra still feels uncomfortable around most people. For most of her life, Sedra spent her time feeling like an alien that was hiding or shielding her true self from other Naz. The only two people that have been let into the softer side of her personality is Luce and Eva. Everyone else continues to be kept at a distance.
History: Catherine Kay Michel was born to her parents Owen and Jane Michel, in one of the southwest desert cities on Roken. She had an older sister and eventually a younger sister. Her father worked for the government and was gone for long hours during the day, while her mother was frequently unemployed and looking for work. Catherine spent much of her earlier years attempting to impress her father, with the encouragement of her much-more-involved mother. Her mother enrolled her in ballet classes as a young child, and Catherine enjoyed doing it up until the age of 8, when she quit.
Her middle school and high school years were chaotic. Catherine often found herself getting into arguments with her teachers and sent off to the principal's office or detention. If she had really applied herself, Catherine may have gotten high marks on her grades. Instead, she ended up ditching most of her classes with friends and smoking or drinking. This all ended up culminating to a trip to juvie on a charge of arson when she was sixteen. This stay--along with the vast disappointment expressed by her parents--frightened her enough to help get her back on track.
Once Catherine graduated from high school, she enrolled in the local community college and began working towards a degree in teaching young children--something her father would have liked. In the middle of her college years, she met Mark. It took perhaps half a year before he proposed to her, and they got married not soon after. Catherine was still a young twenty year old when this happened, and her parents weren't too thrilled with the idea. Still, Catherine was able to finish her degree and begin working as a student teacher at one of the elementary schools.
Three years later Catherine had her first child, a son named Andrew. The happiness of being a parent was short-lived, however, as Catherine was lured by Mark (who had been infected by Naz a year or so earlier) to a doctor's office where Catherine was infected. Thus, Sedra was born.
Sedra began as a low-ranking Naz, and her sole job was to lure Catherine's father Owen to be infected. This plan was ultimately successful, and Catherine's whole family was eventually infested by the Naz. Seeing that Sedra was a competent Naz, the higher-ups decided to promote her to the government facility that they had just recently taken from Catherine's father. This facility was transformed into a place to test and create spaceship weaponry. After a few months in charge, Sedra was sent off into space and onto one of the Naz spaceships to be trained in energy weapon usage and general weapons knowledge. Sedra had a particular interest in the scientific and mathematical aspect of life, and so much of her learning came naturally.
Two years after Catherine's infestation by Sedra, she returned to Roken to direct the activities at the desert facility. This was where Sedra met another Naz called Lassic. Some months after Sedra had began an illicit relationship with Lassic, she became pregnant with a daughter, Eva. Mark's Naz, Sefren, found out about this and threatened to expose the two of them. Sedra was forced to allow both Andrew and Eva to be taken away to a facility located on some mysterious part of the world. A year later, Lassic (in another body, this time female) disappeared as well.
Sedra was left alone and in charge of the facility--until, that is, Lassic reappeared. It turns out that Lassic's host had been freed in the process, and Sedra was thrown into a very confusing period of her life; defying common sense, she realized that she had begun to develop feelings for the free human. With a little bit of help from some free humans, Sedra was able to free her children as well. For a year, Sedra spent time raising her children in secrecy and juggling a very tricky situation with the free human resistance.
Eventually this all caught up to her. Her relationship and her children were found out by some high Naz officials, and she was sentenced to a fixed trial. Facing a slow and agonizing death, Sedra and Luce decided to find a way to leave the planet and escape with their children. During the escape, however, there was an accident involving Sedra and Catherine. This accident ended up giving Sedra full control over Catherine's body, and suddenly the Naz found herself completely alone in an alien body.
RP Sample: ((This writing sample is actually a short story I wrote awhile back involving Catherine and her father.))
Tick tick tick tick.
"Dad."
Catherine was surprised how soft her voice had come out. The word was quickly swallowed by the steady tick tick tick of her father's keyboard. Catherine stood in the door frame of his study, her slender fingers clasp delicately around the glossy square of a Polaroid. Her father was seated across from the doorway, his frame outlined by the white glow of the computer screen. He was hunched over, glasses shining and fingers tapping away. Papers were stacked in various columns near him, and sticky notes lined up in rows along the nearby wall. It was an intimidating room to be in--large, bare, and cold. When she had been younger, she had never been allowed in. However, the door had been open tonight which usually meant she could go in and visit. That he wasn't busy. But he was clearly wrapped up in something at his computer tonight.
He's working. Probably shouldn't bother him. Catherine twisted the ball of her foot against the hardwood floor, tracing her fingers around the thin edges of the photo in her hand. Tentatively, she took another step forward. She cleared her throat. "Hey. Dad?"
His typing stopped abruptly, and he ran a heavy hand through his dark hair. Then, with a prolonged sigh, he leaned back. The leather chair gave a low squeak and tilted. Catherine lifted her eyebrows, anticipating him turning around to face her. He didn't bother. "What, Catherine?" Trying not to let it faze her, she straightened.
"I have something for you," she said, flipping the photo over and over nervously. She started to walk towards him, but caught herself and stopped. Tapping a finger against the photo, she tilted her head. His head was blocking the computer monitor, but she could see some sort of program open. "Do you want to see it?" The question was immediately met with a loud sigh. Catherine flinched.
"Quick, I have to get back to working. This is important."
Catherine felt her heart lift. She skittered over to his computer desk, dodging a couple boxes that had been laid carelessly around on the floor. She placed the photo flat on his desk, and then stepped back patiently. He adjusted his glasses, scooping the photo from off his desk. As he looked at it, Catherine began talking.
"I figured, you know. You like the desert, and you like cactus flowers. So I went out, me and a couple friends, outside. And we were out, and I found this crazy looking flower--"
He held it back out to her. "Yeah, it's great."
Catherine stopped, eyes resting on the photo. He hadn't even looked at it long enough to see what it was. She tried not to frown, plucking it from between his fingertips so it wouldn't fall. "Well. Yeah, but it's for you dad."
"Oh. Okay." His voice held a hint of impatience. He wanted her to leave. On all other days, Catherine would have. She wouldn't have even tried this in the first place, but it had been a suggestion from her mother. But it was useless. When had he ever cared about what she did? When had he ever given her anything but a passing interest? It always went this way. When she did something important? Something good? He'd just say 'okay'.
Doing well in school? Okay.
Made the honor roll? Okay.
Did a great performance in ballet? Okay.
Got into a great college? Okay.
About the only thing that had ever gotten his attention was when she had gone to juvie a couple years back. He had been angry, and he had yelled at her and threatened to take away her possessions and privileges. It had almost gotten her kicked out of the house, but he had reacted. It had made him care about something involving her, if only for a second.
Yet, had it been worth it? Her mother had been disappointed, and that disappointment had worn on Catherine. She couldn't stand seeing her mother's face with that expression. That 'we didn't raise you like this, what are you doing to our family?' look. Her sisters never got in trouble, they never did anything bad. Her cousins were the same way. They weren't her. So Catherine had asked her mother what to do, how to make her father happy. Her mother suggested doing this. "Give your father something he likes. Maybe a photo or something." She had said. "He'll appreciate the thought." Her mother's smile was encouraging--it always was--so Catherine had agreed to do it.
"Do you like it, dad?"
He had turned towards his computer again, one hand curled around the computer mouse. The other hand hovered over his keyboard. "Mhm." Tick tick tick tick. "You should use it for class or something. Don't you have some class you take for that stuff?" It wasn't a question that he would hear the answer to, even if she shouted it. He had already checked out of the conversation, checked out of her presence. His mind was back in his work.
Catherine felt her stomach tighten. She wanted to yell at him. The words were there, angry on her lips, ready to burst from her lungs. Instead, her expression flattened with a fake smile, and she let the photo slip from her fingertips. It spiraled and twirled lazily on its journey to the floor, coming to rest on top of her toes. The little scribbled note on the back was barely visible in the dim room light, but she knew what it said. For you. Love ya, Dad.
Lifting her foot away from it, she turned to the doorway. Then she paused. One last try, then she'd give up. "I'll just leave it here."
The response came later, once she had slipped out of the room. "Okay."
